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Some of this, some of that

Whatever crazy thoughts come into my mind

My Philosophy
Posted:Mar 17, 2016 7:12 am
Last Updated:Mar 18, 2016 12:46 pm
42784 Views

Ban shredded cheese.

Make America grate again.
1 comment
Was I Wrong?
Posted:Mar 14, 2016 8:28 am
Last Updated:Mar 15, 2016 4:38 am
40487 Views

I was sitting in on a high school math class the other day and was probably daydreaming a little.

The teacher noticed this and immediately asked me, "Quick, what is 2 and 4 and 28 and 47?"

I said, "NBC, FOX, A&E and Cartoon Network."
2 Comments
Holiday
Posted:Mar 11, 2016 3:26 am
Last Updated:Mar 14, 2016 8:28 am
41413 Views

Tomorrow is national Slap an Irritating Co-Worker day.

Get ready to beat the shit out of some asshole with complete impunity.

Have fun.
4 Comments
Do The Math
Posted:Mar 6, 2016 8:54 am
Last Updated:Mar 9, 2016 3:31 am
45596 Views

Trump Airlines..........................Failure

Trump Tower Tampa...............Failure

Trump University......................Failure

Trump Mortgage and Loan.......Failure

Trump Steaks...........................Failure

Trump Vodka............................Failure

Trump Network..........................Failure

Trump Shuttle............................Failure

Trump the Game.......................Failure

Trump Magazine.......................Failure

Trump Ice..................................Failure

Tour de Trump..........................Failure

GotTrump.com..........................Failure

New Jersey Generals................Failure

Trump Entertainment Resorts...Failure

Plus Four Bankruptcies

And a quote from Donald Trump: "I hate losers."
4 Comments
New Congressional Budget
Posted:Mar 3, 2016 10:45 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2016 4:24 am
46430 Views

The new Congressional budget will be determined by things we can afford and things we can't afford. Right now the lists look like this:

THINGS WE CAN'T AFFORD

Healthcare, Infrastructure, Public Transport, Education, Renewable Energy, Clean Environment, Feeding the Poor, Public Elections

THINGS WE CAN AFFORD

Iraq and Iran Wars....$ 4 to 6 Trillion
Wall Street Bailouts...$12.5 Trillion
Big Oil Subsidies.......$37.5 Billion per year
F35 Program..............$1.5 Trillion

If you have anything to add to either list, contact your state representatives.
4 Comments
A Quote About Donald Trump
Posted:Mar 2, 2016 10:47 am
Last Updated:Mar 3, 2016 3:24 am
47714 Views

"You might not care if Donald Trump says, 'Muslims must register with the government' because you're not one. You might not care if Donald Trump says he's going to 'round up all the Hispanic immigrants' because you're not one. And you might not care if Donald Trump says it's okay to rough up black protesters because you're not one. And you might not care that Donald Trump wants to suppress journalists because you're not one.

But think about this. If he keeps going and actually becomes president he might get around to you, and you better hope there's someone left to help you."

Air Force Col. Tom Moe (Ret)
A prisoner of war in Viet Nam
4 Comments
The Haircut
Posted:Mar 1, 2016 9:36 am
Last Updated:Mar 2, 2016 10:47 am
45977 Views

One day a florist walked into his barber shop for a haircut. When the barber was finished, the florist went to pay, but the barber said, "I can not accept your money. I'm doing community service."

The florist went away very happy.

The next day when he went to open his shop, the barber found a dozen roses and a card that said, "Thank you."

A while later a policeman came in for a haircut. When the barber was finished, the policeman went to pay, but the barber said, "I can not accept your money. I'm doing community service."

The policeman went away very happy.

The next day when the barber went to open his shop, he found a dozen doughnuts with a note that said, "Thank You."

A little later a Congressman came in for a haircut. When the barber was finished, the Congressman went to pay, but the barber said, "I can not accept your money. I'm doing community service."

The Congressman went away very happy.

The next day when the barber went to open his shop, he found a dozen Congressmen waiting in line.
2 Comments
I'd Have Said the Same Thing
Posted:Feb 27, 2016 7:42 am
Last Updated:Feb 28, 2016 4:57 am
47106 Views

An Irishman was in an accident with a truck owned by a huge conglomerate. At the trial to determine how much compensation he's receive, he was cross-examined by the company's lawyer.

"When police asked how you were, didn't you say you were fine?"

"Well, I was just takin' me cow Bessie to town when..."

"I don't care about your cow. Just answer the question."

"I was approaching this intersection and Bessie was in the back of the truck..."

"Your Honor, will you please tell this man to cease all the unimportant things and answer the question?"

The judge said, "I'm interested in hearing this man's story. Continue, Paddy."

"Well, as I was saying, I was driving along with Bessie in the rear when this huge company truck runs a stop sign and plows into me. Bessie gets thrown out and is tossed across the road. I'm hurt and dazed and I crawl out of my truck. I see a policeman walk up to Bessie who is moaning and mooing in pain. He takes out his gun and shoots her in the head. Then he comes up to me and asks how I am.

"What the fuck did you expect me to say?"
1 comment
The Sheepdog
Posted:Feb 8, 2016 8:48 am
Last Updated:Jul 5, 2016 10:48 am
50361 Views

A farmer had a talking sheepdog.

One day the farmer said, "My sheep are roaming all over. I want you to gather them all together in one place."

The sheepdog said," Okay," and went about getting all the sheep into one pen.

Then the farmer said, "Did you get them all? I hope you counted them."

The sheepdog said, "Yep. There are 40."

"Forty?" the farmer said. "I only have 38 sheep."

The sheepdog said, "I rounded them up."
2 Comments
French Art
Posted:Feb 6, 2016 4:18 am
Last Updated:Feb 7, 2016 3:38 am
48985 Views

Even with gas prices fairly low, keeping my vehicle in fuel is like French art.

I have no Monet. So I can not buy Degas. Because of that I can't make my VanGogh. I hope you don't think my language is Toulusse, but without gas I can't make Latrech to the grocery store.
1 comment

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