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Some of this, some of that

Whatever crazy thoughts come into my mind

Asshole in Chief at it Again
Posted:Feb 26, 2017 6:16 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2017 4:02 am
616 Views

A new report notes that Donald Trump disagrees with a Department of Homeland Security intelligence report that says his ban on Muslims does not make the U.S. any safer and in fact it actually helps ISIS recruit new members who may not have wanted to join their ranks before.

But everyone knows that Trump is smarter than any of our intelligence agencies. Just ask him.

This asshole will get us into more trouble than ever because of his ego.
21 Comments
Learning to Cuss
Posted:Feb 23, 2017 11:49 am
Last Updated:Feb 26, 2017 6:25 am
981 Views

A 6 year old and a 4 year old are raking the lawn when the 6 year old says, "I think it's time we started cussing."

The 4 year old agrees and the 6 year old says, "Tomorrow at breakfast we start."
I'll say hell and you say ass."

The next day their mother comes into the kitchen and says, "What would you boys like for breakfast?"

The 6 year old says, "Hell, Mom, I think I'll have some Cheerios."

WHACK! He gets belted across the mouth and flies off his chair. He runs for his bedroom with his mother in hot pursuit, slapping his rear end at every step.

When the mother returns she says to the 4 year old, "What do you want for breakfast?"

He answers, "I don't know, but you can bet your sweet ass it won't be Cheerios."
7 Comments
The Latest Scam
Posted:Feb 11, 2017 7:49 am
Last Updated:Feb 16, 2017 10:45 am
2503 Views

I just read in the paper of a new scam making the rounds. Your phone rings and when you answer, the person on the other end asks, "Can you hear me?"

If this happens to you, DON"T SAY YES. Your answer is being recorded, and by saying yes, you are giving the scammers a way into credit card information, on-line banking information, on-line shopping information, and a host of other things. I'm not sure how it works, but the key is you saying yes.

So if you get a call like this one. HANG UP. Do not reply at all, and for God's sake, DON"T SAY YES.
13 Comments
I Heard It In Church
Posted:Feb 4, 2017 11:27 am
Last Updated:Feb 20, 2017 4:41 am
3146 Views

In church last week an elderly couple sat in front of me.

The wife turned to the husband and whispered, "I just blew a silent fart. What should I do?'

The husband replied, "Get new batteries for your hearing aids."
8 Comments
I Heard It In Church
Posted:Feb 4, 2017 11:26 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2017 9:49 pm
2766 Views

In church last week an elderly couple sat in front of me.

The wife turned to the husband and whispered, "I just blew a silent fart. What should I do?'

The husband replied, "Get new batteries for your hearing aids."
0 Comments
To Irishpie12
Posted:Jan 31, 2017 4:40 am
Last Updated:Feb 1, 2017 11:22 am
3559 Views

Irish, I got the email you sent, but because I'm a mere standard member, I can't open it to read it. And I refuse to pay OP for the privilege of reading what should be free. If you want to, reply to this blog with what you wrote me. Thanks.
4 Comments
2016 Federal Income taxes
Posted:Jan 30, 2017 4:18 pm
Last Updated:Feb 4, 2017 11:26 am
3575 Views

I just finished calculating my 2016 federal income tax. It looks like I'll be donating about 15,000 dollars to the cause.

I wonder how much the POTUS will pay? I'm guessing about $15.000 less than me.
10 Comments
2016 Federal Income taxes
Posted:Jan 30, 2017 4:17 pm
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2017 9:49 pm
3067 Views

I just finished calculating my 2016 federal income tax. It looks like I'll be donating about 15,000 dollars to the cause.

I wonder how much the POTUS will pay? I'm guessing about $15.000 less than me.
0 Comments
I Like This Better
Posted:Jan 27, 2017 6:39 am
Last Updated:Jan 30, 2017 4:18 pm
4368 Views

I went to the doctor the other day. He gave me two months to live.

I shot him.

The judge gave me 30 years.
9 Comments
I Like This Better
Posted:Jan 27, 2017 6:37 am
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2017 9:49 pm
3824 Views

I went to the doctor the other day. He gave me two months to live.

I shot him.

The judge gave me 30 years.
0 Comments

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